This is my rifle. There are many like it but this one is mine.
Guns. Millions of guns. Thunder spewing sniper rifles. Scoped shotties. Explosive SMGs. Borderlands is a first person shooter devoted entirely to the quest for the perfect boom stick. Every plundered weapons cache represents the infinite potential for superior fire power. Each slaughtered outlaw gives birth to yet more torso shredding artillery. This is hardcore gun porn to sate even the lustiest firearm nut.
With such a staggering choice of randomly generated weaponry, 17,750,000 at the last count, comes the monumental chore of stat comparison; armpit burning frustation as you evaluate yet another Assault Rifle. Lost in a mess of maps, missions, stats and upgrades, the gunplay, so utterly crucial to the game, often takes a back seat. Slowly, but surely, you’ll acclimatise. By level 20, you’ll know at a glance which guns to keep and which to discard or sell. And then you can concentrate on killing.
And, cor blimey, is there a lot of killing. Borderlands is a vast, lawless junkyard of bondage-clad bandits and vicious beasties. The plot, trite in the extreme (but who cares!), is to find a sacred vault, believed to contain unfathomable wealth. Along the way you’ll be inundated with side quests, sometimes 8 at a time, by the grotesque inhabitants of Pandora. 160 side quests in all and every single one of them a kill, fetch or find expedition. All of them! Without exception. But it’s cool, no sweat. You’ve got your guns to keep you company.
Guns. Millions of guns. With such cool names. Pestilent Defiler. Brutal Viper. Bloody Equalizer. Cruel Repeater. Each gun a unique metal snowflake with more character and emotional appeal than Pandora’s entire human population. The Sentinal, for example, a beautifully striped red and black Assault Rifle, like Dennis the Menace, complete with awesome scope sight, stunning accuracy and battery acid bullets. You’ll be loathe to part with some of your guns. But, eventually, you will relinquish them in favour of the next metal minx that flashes her ample stats in your direction.
Guns. Millions of guns. Thunder spewing sniper rifles. Scoped shotties. Explosive SMGs. Borderlands is a first person shooter devoted entirely to the quest for the perfect boom stick. Every plundered weapons cache represents the infinite potential for superior fire power. Each slaughtered outlaw gives birth to yet more torso shredding artillery. This is hardcore gun porn to sate even the lustiest firearm nut.
With such a staggering choice of randomly generated weaponry, 17,750,000 at the last count, comes the monumental chore of stat comparison; armpit burning frustation as you evaluate yet another Assault Rifle. Lost in a mess of maps, missions, stats and upgrades, the gunplay, so utterly crucial to the game, often takes a back seat. Slowly, but surely, you’ll acclimatise. By level 20, you’ll know at a glance which guns to keep and which to discard or sell. And then you can concentrate on killing.
And, cor blimey, is there a lot of killing. Borderlands is a vast, lawless junkyard of bondage-clad bandits and vicious beasties. The plot, trite in the extreme (but who cares!), is to find a sacred vault, believed to contain unfathomable wealth. Along the way you’ll be inundated with side quests, sometimes 8 at a time, by the grotesque inhabitants of Pandora. 160 side quests in all and every single one of them a kill, fetch or find expedition. All of them! Without exception. But it’s cool, no sweat. You’ve got your guns to keep you company.
Guns. Millions of guns. With such cool names. Pestilent Defiler. Brutal Viper. Bloody Equalizer. Cruel Repeater. Each gun a unique metal snowflake with more character and emotional appeal than Pandora’s entire human population. The Sentinal, for example, a beautifully striped red and black Assault Rifle, like Dennis the Menace, complete with awesome scope sight, stunning accuracy and battery acid bullets. You’ll be loathe to part with some of your guns. But, eventually, you will relinquish them in favour of the next metal minx that flashes her ample stats in your direction.
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